Raising responsible kids

“He is so entitled, what a spoiled young man,” “why does she feel so entitled.” Are any of these sentences familiar? Yes. You have either spoken these words about someone or heard them spoken. Why are there so many entitled people walking around? Why are a lot of youths of this current generation not owning up to their mistakes and responsibilities?They didn’t grow up that way. The Christian Bible says, “raise a child in the way he should go, and when he grows, he will not depart from it.”This is sound and solid parental advice.The formative years of a child’s life are crucial. This is when you either build strong, responsible, loving individuals or you build entitled, whinnying individuals.It is in your hands.You cannot raise kids who have never had to take responsibility for anything in their life and expect them to learn how to take responsibility suddenly.Teaching them to be responsible.When your kids make mistakes in the house, do you just brush it off? Do you draw their attention to the mistake? Do you lash out?Brushing it off makes them believe that they have done nothing wrong, and there is no need to take responsibility. Lashing out will cause them to withdraw into their shell, and they will not own up for fear of abuse. The middle ground is to call their attention to whatever mistake they have made, get those to own up to their mistakes, and follow up with corrective actions.Whenever we allow kids to go on about their lives without calling their attention to whatever mistakes they have made, we give them the impression that they can get away with anything. They will believe that nothing is their fault.Regardless of how much we love our kids and want them to grow up knowing that they are loved, we also need to raise them to take responsibility for their actions and face whatever consequences might come from their efforts. That way, you raise individuals who take care when making decisions and taking actions.To defend or to reprimand. When kids misbehave outside, do we rush to their defense/ do we reprimand them/ are we damaging their ego when we reprimand them.A lot of parents make this mistake. In order not to damage their child’s “confidence,” they defend their child’s misdeed.A wrongly worded reprimand can do some damage to anyone, but a well-timed, well place reprimand, followed with a demand for action, will help the child grow up responsible.Rather than jump in and defend the child’s wrongs, quietly call them to order. Speak to their misdeeds, not to their personality. Say words like, “I am a bit disappointed in how this played out “do not say words like “you are stupid for doing this .”Do not attack the child’s person, focus on the wrong. When teaching children to take responsibility for their actions, avoid being insulting or condescending.Speak to them with respect and tell them your expectations from them.Adults today were children of yesterday. Raise your kid right.

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